No, I'm not writing a review of the Charles Dickens book. I’m writing about personal expectations for life. We have a tendency to expect certain things from certain people and often times our expectations are too high, leaving us disappointed when the expectations don’t come true.
For me, this tends to happen only with people I am very close to or want to be very close to. I expect compliments about certain things, regular phone calls and emails, and other courtesies that wouldn’t be expected of an acquaintance. So, for a long time I kept getting frustrated because my expectations for how others treated me were not met. And it took a long time to grow out of that – to expect nothing from anyone. Sometimes it’s good to just embrace being an individual not dependent on anyone. So, for most of this year, that is how I’ve been. I have lots of acquaintances but no one I really have depended on. If someone says they’ll call back and they don’t, oh well. If someone ditched me last minute, oh well.
But this also leaves a lot lacking. We all need close intimate relationships – not necessarily a romantic relationship, but a couple of people we can depend on to lift us up anytime, to call us just to say hi, to spend time with on a daily basis. And I feel myself longing for that again. But I don’t know who to turn to for that kind of friendship. My best friend doesn’t have time to be the best friend that I need/want. Hopefully someone good will come my way. I just can’t go force it on someone. Things like developing close bonds are kind of unpredictable and if you try to mess with the ways of the world, it can easily backfire.
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